* TRIGGER ALERT * This blog has been on my heart to write for quite some time now and to be honest, the only reason I waited this long to post it was simply because I knew that it is a topic that has the ability to trigger those who believe that their mandate here on earth is to correct and monitor everyone else’s spiritual journeys. Truth be told I just wasn’t in the mood to deal with the manifestation and projection of people’s own fears, guilt and wounds which tends to happen when they get triggered by truth. But then I was reminded that Jesus’ journey was also one where He triggered the hell out of people and even the religious leaders of His time (literally their own internal hells) by speaking truth. And look at what the result of Him being faithful and committing to speaking truth did for this world and for each of us. So I decided to go ahead and speak my truth anyway. And honestly, if this does rattle your religious cage, or ruffle your internal belief system’s feathers a little, perhaps you need to ask yourself why reading this blog triggered you if you are not a culprit, albeit subconsciously in some way. Heck, when I first awakened to this truth I was triggered by it too because I realized I’ve certainly done this at times in my life as well. So I’m finally writing this now because the pressing on my heart to speak this truth is much stronger than my desire to avoid people’s manifestations or projections any longer. We don’t need more perpetuating of false truths and masks. What we need is truth and authenticity and to awaken, because as a collective we are busy wounding and killing ourselves and each other through our unwillingness to hear or even speak truth in order to stay in the illusion of what society says is acceptable and true. Last year I attended a CANSA event and one of the speakers was a lady who had beaten the battle with breast cancer a few years ago, but it came back aggressively a few years later. I always struggled to relate to people who are in this battle or who knows someone that is because thankfully I’ve never had any personal experience with this illness myself. But this lady spoke authentically, honestly and openly and didn’t sugar coat what the journey is really like, and at one point in her talk she said:Read More
“If you know someone who has cancer, don’t tell them to call you or to ask if they need help with anything because they won’t! Just use your head about what they need help with on a practical level like fetching their kids from school, making dinner, etc. while they are dealing with the after effects of chemo.”This was the first time I could relate to someone who has cancer because although my situation was not nearly as bad as what someone battling with this illness is facing, I myself had been in situations before where what I really needed at that time was real and genuine help and for specific needs to be met. And when I finally got vulnerable and shared my situation with a few close people they responded to it by bombarding me with hundreds motivational quotes and scriptures every day. What I needed wasn’t motivation. What I needed wasn’t scripture. What I needed was practical help, which was the one thing nobody even thought of or offered. I could see myself in this lady. I could feel her emotions as she explained that she was already vulnerable enough to share with those closest to her that she was battling cancer and what it was like, but their “I’m here if you need anything” didn’t help her at all especially since they already knew her situation so why should she then again make herself vulnerable to ask for help if they could clearly see and knew that she needed some? To be honest thinking back at when I was going through a very bad time in my life, the daily motivational quotes and scriptures from those who actually knew what I was going through did nothing except to peeve me off and cause me to be angry at God and at people. Each time I would get another quote or scripture that I’m not sure what they were hoping it would miraculously change about my situation or circumstances I was facing, I remember thinking… “I have a bible that I can and do read myself daily and a motivational quote is a Google away if that was really what I needed” What made it worse was that almost 100% of the time the scriptures and quotes they would send me were so off point with where I was at internally, how I was feeling and what I was going through that it actually just made things even worse instead of better. These days, seeing posts on Facebook and receiving broadcast messages with motivational quotes and bible scriptures on our phones have become a daily occurrence. Its become the “trendy” thing to do. The new “it” thing to make sure that the entire virtual world of strangers perceive you as someone who is inspirational and a Christian in case they had any doubts about it. But is sending and posting scriptures and motivational quotes just another way of soothing ourselves and our own conscience? When someone is vulnerable enough to share their truth about a struggle or obstacle they are facing, the world (even their close friends and Christian brothers & sisters) respond to it by sending them motivational quotes and bible scriptures, and I can’t help but think, “Why? What are they hoping that scripture or motivational quote will do for that person?”. Have we become so shallow and blunt because of social media that we’ve actually deluded ourselves into thinking or believing that a motivational quote or scripture will somehow miraculously fix that person’s problem, lighten their load or heal their wound? Or is it merely a cleverly masked subconscious way of absolving ourselves from our real responsibility to one another as the human race and just a way of soothing our own conscience because “we helped” or “inspired” someone by sending them a quote or a scripture? Has it become just another way for people to hide from what they really think and believe deep down and to perpetuate the false perception of others that all is well in their own world? Or perhaps it is just another way of projecting our own inner fears & wounds that are hidden so deeply even from ourselves because it isn’t what the world sees as acceptable or what we were told and taught to believe? In Matthew 7: 9-10 Jesus says:
“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish will give him a snake instead?“To me, responding to the call for help with a scripture or a motivational quote when someone has made themselves vulnerable to you and shared their struggle with you, is like giving a rock to someone who asked for a bread, or a snake to someone who asked for a fish. I mean if their struggle is financial, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that what they probably need right now are things like food, fuel, toilet paper, etc. and a scripture doesn’t supply their need or even actually show them any love in their time of need, does it? Sending a scripture or motivational quote to someone who has been vulnerable enough to share their situation with you, is really a cop out that absolves us of actually having to do something, get involved or meet someone else’s need. When I started awakening to this unfortunate new “trend” to throw a motivational quote or scripture at someone who is in need of practical help, I turned to the word of God in search of what God’s word says about when we should give word to someone, and what I found was a massive aha moment that shook me to my core. Almost every scripture in the bible where someone said something or was asked to say something to encourage or really help or heal or teach others in some way, the instruction: “Tell them only what I tell you to” or the words “I only speak what God has told or tells me to say or what I hear Him speak” are always included in each of these scriptures. Jesus also said that He only says what He hears His Father say, which tells me He never spoke out of His own flesh, mind or ego. In Proverbs 25:11 it is written:
“A word fitly spoken and in due season is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”Proverbs 15:23 says:
“A person finds joy in giving an apt reply and a word in season, how good it is!”The word of God has power and is living word, but it is the right word spoken at the right time or sent to someone on God’s instruction that can and will actually heal and transform. Not just any old nice little scripture you stumble across or found on social media or google to send to that person whom you know is facing a tough time. Imagine for a moment how different the story of the woman who was about to be stoned for adultery would have turned out if Jesus didn’t say what He heard His Father say in that moment, but just recited any scripture he thought sounded good or right in that moment? For example what if He in that moment recited Proverbs 7:26-27 to her instead “Many are the victims she has brought down, her slain are a mighty throng. Her house is a highway to the grave leading down to the chambers of death.” I’m sure the story would have ended a lot differently if He did. That wouldn’t have healed or encouraged her at all because it would have been scripture, but it would have been the wrong word at the wrong time. What she needed was love and God knew it, and because Jesus only spoke what He heard His Father say, he was able to give her exactly the right words that she needed in that moment. So why then do we send random scriptures to people if we weren’t explicitly instructed by God to send them exactly that scripture? The word is only powerful when its the right word at the right time and random scriptures sent from our flesh and ego just for whatever our conscious or subconscious reasons are has zero effect. In fact it could do more harm than good. So many people ask where is God in things like children starving around the world, in people being homeless, etc. but I think God’s answer to that question would be: “Where are my people?” We are God’s hands and feet on this earth, not His mouth piece unless explicitly told by Him to say what He tells us to say in a given moment. If someone you know trusts you enough to make themselves vulnerable to share their situation or circumstances they are facing with you but they don’t own a bible, please rather go and buy them one. That way they can read it for themselves and God Himself can give them the right words they need at the right time for their situation through the Holy Spirit. But don’t throw a bible scripture or motivational quote at them as a plaster to put on their situation and to make yourself feel relevant or better. Ask yourself: “What needs can I meet for them in their situation that would make what they are going through easier for them or lighten their burden on a practical level? Loving our neighbor is not sending them a motivational quote or scripture every day when you know they have no food in their home or they are facing chemotherapy or the death of a loved one.
- If someone you know has cancer and is receiving chemo, don’t ask if you can help, just tell them you are going to fetch their kids at school or show up with a warm meal for their family at dinner time.
- If someone you know is struggling financially, put petrol in their tank or buy them toilet paper and food.
- If someone you know is facing a bad time in their business, share their business with friends or refer people to them.
- If you see someone on the street who is cold, give them a blanket.